What's for dinner.....and oldie but goodie...

Written with ~A~ December 21, 2005
------------------------------------------------------------

I hate meal planning. Really, I do. I hate trying to figure out what to make for these spongers every night of the week. If you were to ask each one of my children what they wanted for dinner you would get 4 different answers. For Example:

The boy always wants Nachos. Really, there isn’t anything this boy won’t try to digest. But nachos are his THING!

“Mom, I want the Nachos with that cheese sauce you make and sour cream and spicy meat and chile and really hot salsa.”
“Not tonight Boy, we can’t have nachos.”
“Well….how about taco salads?”
“Isn’t that the same thing as nachos but WITH Salad?” (he sure is a sly one)
“Well……(now picture an 8 year old with the wheels turning) technically no, because I will use more lettuce than chips. *pause* AND I won’t need cheese sauce, just shredded cheese and maybe some ranch dressing.”
“No”
“UGH” I NEVER get to eat anything!!”

That’s right. I starve the boy. I won’t fix him nachos so he never gets to eat. What a terrible terrible life he must lead. *barf* *gag*

Now my 6 year old "H", she pretends to be the best, healthiest eater ever. I mean I mention cauliflower and her little face lights up. As long as she can look like the golden child she will eat anything. If I have three whineies about what’s for dinner, she comes in saying: "I will eat anything that you make mommy!! I LOVE IT!" AHHHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhh its good to know I have one good child. But unfortunately this declaration of palate easiness is what usually prompts my 5 year old, "E" into fits.

“MOM she is just saying that because she is trying to show off and be the bestest stinky poopie favorite girl!!”
“OK E girl, what do you want for dinner?”
“I don’t know…..anything that H doesn’t want. Oh, and make sure there are no potatoes in it.”
“You mean TOMATOS.”
“Right mommy……..I don’t like potatoes.”

This always prompts "H" to say "E": "You don’t know how to talk and whatever Mommy makes I will eat so you will never get to choose what’s for dinner." *insert screams of rage from "E" and hair pulling* “ITS NOOOOOOOOOOOOOT FAAAAIIIIRRRRRR!!! I NEVER GET TO CHOOSE.”

*sigh*

My 3 year old, J-elf" really doesn’t care what’s for dinner, because she usually doesn’t eat. If its not processed or a sweetened junk food, she won’t like it. Usually she just wants marshmallows or cookies for dinner. And being the last, WHAT THE HECK. WHY NOT. Go for it. As long as she isn’t screaming I am all for it!

Well - not really because I have a sense of Mommydoom when I think of my sweet 3 year old eating only marshmallows and cookies for dinner. What her teeth and little insides must look like from eating all that sugar. HOW CAN I ALLOW THAT. I must make greens and chicken and veggies for dinner! I MUST. And I do. And I get:

“WHAT THE HECK IS THIS?!?!”
“MOMMEEEEEEEEEEE this has POTATOS IN IT!”
“EWwwwwwwwwwww is this suppose to look like this?”
“What’s that smell…..did somebody barf in here?”

whine whine whine sawb sawb whine whine whine

“I thought we were having nachos?!?!?!?!?”
“Do we have to eat ALL of this?”
“Mommyyyyyyy I’m not hungry anymore”

*Sigh* Little bunch of ingrates. And to think, I get to do this every night!! At least I know I am not alone in my dinner dramas. ~A~ has similar issues!!

~A~ says:
______________________________________________________
Ahhhhhhhhhh yes, supper time, sends chills down my spine. I love to cook, but planning a meal around four kids fucking sucks.

Here, my kids are self proclaimed “Half-vegetarians”.

Me – “What the hell do you mean by that?” Yes I know I shouldn’t say hell to the kids but this caught me off guard.
Button (oldest at 8 and appointed kid rep) – “It means that we only eat meat and vegetables.”
Me – “Yes, that’s usually what we eat.”
Button – “But no potatoes. We don’t eat potatoes.”

Which is true, my kids will not eat potatoes. They’re probably the only kids in the world who will snarff down on piles of Brussels sprouts but set a French fry in front of them, or even a potato chip, they’ll scream like they’re being tortured inhumanely.

Let’s take a trip back in time. About five years, not too far.

Little Button is about 3 years old. One of my favorite ages, but this day we’re at my parents house and my mother has serve scalloped potatoes as a side dish.

Button taking a bite of potatoes – “Mmmmmmmmm oh oh oh, I’m going to yack!”
Me – “No, you’re being picky, eat your potatoes.”
Button spitting out the potatoes – “Noooooooooo weeally, I’m going to have a yackattack!”
Me – “Stop it Button and eat your potatoes, you love potatoes.” Which is true, until this day she loved them.
Nana spoons a bite of potatoes in Buttons mouth and she immediately throws up the potatoes all over the dining room table.

Every mother reading this can stop cringing, lucky of us it wasn’t a whole lot of puke and it wasn’t my table. HA!

And this begins the great potato revolt. The fact that Button being the oldest and most dramatic, her dislike for potatoes has spread fast than syphilis outbreak in Rockdale County. Mashed, baked, fried, chips, hidden in salads, it doesn’t matter they know there’s a hint of potatoes and it drama begins.

“I caaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan’t eat potatooooooooooooooooooooooooooooes! They make me throw up!”
“I hate potatoes, don’t cook them!”
“No no no NOT POTATOES!”

Which invokes the normal response, “These aren’t for you. Do I make you eat potatoes? No, so shut up and eat your broccoli.”

________________________________________________________________


*T* Says:

Ah yes, the broccoli. Every dinners saving grace. Can’t think of a veggie….throw in broccoli. THAT always works!